


+1

by orphan_account



Series: The Barton Family [2]
Category: Sherlock (TV), The Avengers (2012)
Genre: Established Relationship, Family, Getting Together, M/M, Phone Calls & Telephones
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-29
Updated: 2013-03-29
Packaged: 2017-12-06 22:13:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/740723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sherlock kissed me. Could be experiment. Help?? JW</p><p>why r u asking me?? cb</p><p>Desperate. JW</p><p>(Post 2, 4, 6, & 8 but can be read on its own.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	+1

**Author's Note:**

> I got this little plot bunny while in Germany. I hope you guys who were calling for more of the 2, 4, 6, & 8 verse like this! (Also, I'll probably be doing an extra Jim/Brian scene in a bit, too.)

Clint Barton was completely, utterly, _horribly_ bored. Normally this would spell disaster for all, but he was currently being detained by SHIELD. There was no escape. That, and Phil said he’d take the whole weekend off if Clint behaved in every meeting that week. It was a difficult task to manage, but the promise of relaxed late night dinners and lazy, unhurried morning sex was sure to be worth it. A couple of nice, slow, uninterrupted days was just what they needed. 

However, concentrating on Agent Quartermain’s talk on the changes to SHIELD’s harassment policy was getting more and more difficult. Apparently “surveillance” counted as stalking unless officially authorized by SHILED, no matter how warranted the stalking. Seriously? People actually had to be reminded of this? And it wasn’t clearly outlined in the harassment policy before? Honestly, there’s a whole section in the harassment policy that covers breaking into other agents’ houses and watching them sleep. 

SHIELD employs some pretty scary people. 

Clint felt his cell phone vibrate against his thigh from where it was stuffed into one of his many pockets. That was the second time in the past five minutes and Clint was just itching to see what was so urgent. Obviously it wasn’t SHIELD official business, because someone would have told him in person, considering he was suffering through this lecture on the Helicarrier. Clearly no one was dead – he’d at least get an actual call about that – and a major injury would also probably warrant a phone call. Something else personal, then. Maybe Tony and Bruce and blown up a lab again and wanted to know if there was actually anything valuable in his apartment that he’d miss. He really hoped it wasn’t that. Again. 

His phone buzzed a third time and Agent Sitwell who was sitting next to him gave him a questioning look. Clint shot him a half sheepish, half apologetic look before glancing pointedly over to where Phil was, on the other side of the table. A grin spread over the other agent’s face and he mouthed “whipped” quite clearly. Clint stuck his tongue out in response and hoped that Phil wasn’t looking. 

Clint tried to find his ability to concentrate again, tuning his ears to Quartermain’s voice. However he was pulled away yet again by a fourth buzz of his phone. Clint wanted to bang his head against the table in frustration. This was not working. He was severely tempted to just quickly check his messages under the table, but he knew that there was no way that Phil wouldn’t somehow manage to spot him. 

“Why don’t we take a five minute break,” Quartermain said suddenly, bringing Clint back from his thoughts. “Some of you are starting to look a little distracted.” 

Shit. Quartermain was looking directly at him. At least he had time to see what was up with all these stupid text messages. They better be about something important. He only had to survive through forty five more minutes of this stupid meeting before he could go home, and it was Friday, so he could start his wonderful, work free weekend with his boyfriend. 

Clint dug his phone out of his pocket quickly, glaring at the five different sets of passcodes he had to enter before being let into his phone. He should really think about getting another phone that he didn’t have all his work stuff on. Actually, he’d probably still have to have a shit ton of passcodes, considering the fact that all of the phone numbers he had were classified. Even Pepper’s. Well, John’s and Brian’s weren’t classified, but it still wouldn’t be good if someone who wanted revenge on him was able to connect him to his brothers that way. Not that they couldn’t take care of themselves – he just didn’t want to put them in danger. 

Once Clint had bypassed the phone’s security, he tapped his fingers lightly on the touch screen, navigating to his text messages. There were the four that he had just received – the only unread messages on his phone. All from John. He opened them up and began to read. 

Clint? 

Can I have some advice? 

Sherlock kissed me. Could be experiment. 

Help?? 

What the fuck was that supposed to mean? “Could be experiment?” Did this sort of thing happen often? Sherlock had been kind of strange, and John had mentioned that he did some weird experiments when investigating cases, but he thought that those all involved body parts stolen from the morgue. 

Clint frowned and sent off a quick message to John. 

why r u asking me?? 

John’s reply was almost instantaneous. 

Desperate. 

Clint was halfway through typing a reply when he nearly jumped out of his seat as he felt an unexpected hand on his shoulder. It was Phil. How had he so easily lost his situational awareness? 

“The meeting’s starting again,” Phil said quietly, shooting a pointed look at Clint’s phone. 

“ _Phil,_ ” Clint replied, a whine in his voice as he bit his lip and looked over at his boyfriend. “It’s kind of important.” 

“‘Kind of important’?” Phil questioned, raising one eyebrow. “Is someone currently injured?”

“Well, no,” Clint answered, trying not to pout at Phil’s question, “but John’s kind of having an emotional freak out right now.”

“Your brother John?” Phil asked, looking surprised. “What happened?” 

Clint was about to answer, however, he was cut off by someone impatiently clearing their throat. 

“You know, this meeting really isn’t that important,” Agent Quartermain said sarcastically, looking impatient. “You two both have level seven clearance – the harassment policy clearly doesn’t apply to you.”

Clint blushed and was about to make a brash comment, however, he was cut off by Phil this time. 

“We don’t mean any disrespect, Agent Quartermain,” Phil started, his voice level and neutral, “but something more urgent has just come up. I’m sure we can review the new harassment policy later, perhaps tomorrow.”

Clint shot him a slightly betrayed look. He’d gone through the rest of the meetings that week without causing any disturbances. He’d totally earned that Saturday off. He’d have to take it up with Phil later. Clint was quite sure he could find a way to convince him. 

Quartermain looked even more disgruntled now, but he didn’t try to stop them as Clint and Phil walked out of the room. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to – ” Clint started once they’d gotten far enough from the meeting room, but the rest of the words got caught in his throat as Phil’s gun callused hand enveloped his own, fingers intertwining. 

“It was a good excuse for me to escape that meeting. It’s kind of sad to listen to all of the things that SHIELD has to add to its harassment policy, due to the messed up things its operatives do,” Phil said, a light smile on his face. “I trust you to not breaking into the apartments of unsuspecting junior agents.”

“Thank you for that wonderful declaration of trust, Sir,” Clint said, his voice deadpan, although humor sparkled in his eyes. 

“You don’t have to call me Sir now,” Phil said, pulling Clint a little closer to him, so that Clint could feel the heat radiating from his boyfriend’s body. “I figured we could go home first and then you could tell me about John’s emotional dilemma. Maybe I could help.” 

“You’ll probably be a bigger help than me,” Clint replied, a self deprecating half smile on his face. “John’s having some relationship issues, and I kind of suck at relationships, so…”

“Personally, I think you’re really good at relationships,” Phil protested, giving Clint a soft smile that made his heart beat a mile per minute. 

As soon as they were in Phil’s car and out of the sight of any of their coworkers, Clint leaned over to give Phil a long, languid kiss that left him pink cheeked and slightly out of breath. He was about to lean in for another kiss when his phone buzzed rudely, interrupting him. He sighed and sent Phil an apologetic look as he leaned back, situating himself more comfortably in the passenger seat before digging his phone out of his pocket. Phil returned his smile and started the car. 

Clint?? Are you there? 

had 2 escape meeting 

You shouldn’t skip meetings. 

ur more important 

Thanks. :)

luv u 2

Back to the topic, though…

i dont think i can help u

Why not?

i suck @ relationships

You don’t. Also, who else would I ask? 

aaron

Is in Nowhere, Alaska. Can’t get a hold of him.

james 

Doesn’t have relationships – just flings. 

jason 

Has a difficult relationship with his girlfriend. Yours is much more stable. 

i guess…

I know. 

dont u have any other friends u can ask?

Not really. Two divorcees, two people having an affair, an ex, a girl with a crush on Sherlock, a lady who was happy that her husband got the death penalty, and a dominatrix. 

dominatrix? what have u been up 2? ;)

For a case. 

sure

Really! 

“Hey,” Phil said as he turned off the car engine, causing Clint to look up from his phone. “We’re here.” 

“Okay,” Clint replied, sending off another quick text message to John. 

ill call u in a few mins

Ok.

phil wants 2 help 2

Thanks. 

no prob

Clint then stuffed his phone back into his pocket, quickly unbuckling his seatbelt and climbing out of the car. He and Phil went up to Clint’s apartment, barely more than a foot of space between them at all times. Clint relaxed back into Phil’s chest as they sat down on the couch, Phil looping his arms around Clint’s stomach. Clint smiled, but wriggled in his arms slightly in order to fish his phone out of his pocket again, scrolling through his contacts until he found John’s cell number. 

“Clint?” John asked as soon as he picked up his phone. 

“Hey,” Clint replied. “Is it, like, three in the morning over in London or something? You sound really tired.”

“It’s only ten,” John responded, and Clint could hear a slight smile in his voice. “Sherlock and I were just out chasing a murderer, though.” 

“And then he kissed the hell out of you?” Clint asked, his tone slightly teasing. 

“No, that was a bit later,” John answered, his voice sounding even more tired now. “We were relaxing at home for a bit – you know, watching some crap telly and such – and then he just announced that he was going to bed, leaned over, and kissed me. He was gone by the time my brain had started functioning again.” 

“What sort of kiss was it?” Clint asked, trying not to get distracted as Phil began massaging his scalp gently. “The ‘I want to push you up against the wall and fuck you’ type or the ‘goodnight sweetie’ type.” 

“Does it matter?” John questioned, embarrassment clear in his voice. 

“Yes,” Clint chirped. 

“Well, it was more than a standard goodnight kiss, but it wasn’t really…the other one,” John answered. 

“Hmmm…” Clint said, pondering this information before asking his next question. “What makes you think that this could be an experiment?” 

“I don’t know. Sherlock conducts some pretty strange experiments in the name of science,” John said, his tone apprehensive. “I mean, once he spoke to me only in French for a solid week to try and see if a man who was suspected of hiring a French criminal to kill his wife could really have properly negotiated the deal having never learned French and only picking up a few phrases by visiting France for a week. Kissing me for an experiment wouldn’t really be that weird.” 

“But you just finished up a case, didn’t you?” Clint asked. “He’s not working on any other cases, is he?”

“Not that I know of,” John admitted, “but he also does a lot of weird experiments just for the sake of knowing.”

“So, you think he sees you as an experiment?” Clint questioned. 

“Well, no, but…” John replied, clearly struggling with the whole mess. “I don’t know.” 

“Hey,” Phil said softly, his lips brushing the shell of Clint’s left ear. “Could you give me the phone for a sec? I’d like to talk with John for a bit.” 

“Sure,” Clint replied. “Did you hear that, John? I’m handing you over to Phil, now.” 

“Okay,” John said, sounding a little reluctant but also a little hopeful. 

“John,” Phil greeted after slipping the phone from Clint’s hand, holding it up to his own ear. “I would say it’s good to hear from you, but from what I hear things aren’t going too well for you at the moment.”

“Yeah. Sorry to bother you with my romantic drama, but…” John sighed. 

“No – it’s no problem at all,” Phil said kindly, his tone relaxed and his other hand still massaging Clint’s scalp soothingly. “I’m happy to give you whatever advice I can. I do have once question, though.” 

“Yes?”

“How do _you_ feel about Sherlock?” Phil asked, his tone serious. 

“Oh. Ah… good question,” John answered, clearly not having expected such a question. “I guess… I haven’t really thought about Sherlock that way before. Not seriously. I mean, maybe once in passing – it’s kind of hard not to, when everyone keeps assuming we’re a couple – but not really… not romantically…” 

“Would you be open to a relationship with him?” Phil questions. 

“…Yes,” John replied after a moment. “Yes, I would. I mean, we already live together, and go out to dinner together, and talk about, well, everything. We do everything a couple would do.” 

“But is that romantic or just platonic?” Phil pressed. 

“I’m not – I _am_ attracted to Sherlock. Sexually. I’m not gay, though. I’m pretty sure I’m bisexual,” John said quickly and a little awkwardly. “And there’s… honestly, there’s no one I’d rather spend time with, as annoying and crazy as Sherlock is.” 

“Now, what makes you think Sherlock doesn’t feel the same way?” Phil asked carefully, the hand that had been stroking Clint’s hair slipping down to rest on Clint’s shoulder. 

“Well, I’m pretty sure he’s onboard with everything except for the…sexual aspect,” John replied. “He’s not really one for physical contact, and I almost think he’s asexual. I mean, he hardly missed a beat when he first met Irene, and she was stark naked at the time.”

“She’s also female,” Phil pointed out. “And she’s not you.” 

“He could be demisexual, you know,” Clint said, leaning in so that his voice would be picked up by the phone that Phil was still holding. “Only attracted sexually to people he’s very emotionally connected to.” 

“This is all one big ‘if’ though,” John sighed. “I’m glad that you guys are supporting me, but I need to be realistic, here.” 

“We _are_ being realistic,” Clint protested, taking the phone back from Phil. “You said that Sherlock doesn’t really care for physical contact, but he was all over you when you came to visit for Thanksgiving. I believe I have a photo of you two sleeping together on the couch after watching Ghostbusters.” 

“I’m still not sure,” John said reluctantly. 

“Just ask him,” Clint said confidently. “That’s what I did after Phil kissed me. I asked him if he was attracted to me, and he said yes. Problem solved.” 

“Sherlock might not be so willing to admit what he’s feeling, though,” John protested. “I don’t think he’s going to be quite that open.”

“Well, he was being pretty open by kissing you,” Clint pointed out. “Just try it. You’ll work it out eventually.” 

“I’m holding you to that,” John grumbled, although there was some humor evident in his voice.

“Go get your man,” Clint said, laughing slightly. “You can tell me how it went later. Tomorrow morning, maybe.”

“If this does happen, I’m not actually going to tell you if we had sex,” John said, and Clint could practically hear him rolling his eyes. “I’ll tell you if we start…something, though.” 

“Good. Talk to you later!” Clint chirped. 

“Will do,” John replied. 

Clint hung up and placed the cell phone on the coffee table, closing his eyes and snuggling back into Phil’s chest. 

“It’ll work out,” Phil said, his hands moving to massage the tension out of Clint’s shoulders. 

“I know it will,” Clint replied, letting out a soft gasp as he felt Phil press his lips to the side of his neck, sucking and nipping at the soft skin there. “Mmmm, maybe we should take this – ”

“To the bedroom?” Phil finished his hands now tracing circles on Clint’s hip and stomach. 

“Yeah,” Clint said, sighing contentedly. “Yeah, that sounds – great.” 

“You did a good job this week, staying on task during meetings,” Phil said, breathing against Clint’s neck. “I think you deserve a reward.”

“Let’s go,” Clint gasped, stumbling up from Phil’s lap and tugging him over to his bedroom. 

The next morning when Clint checked his phone, there was one short message:

Thanks. 

Clint smiled.


End file.
